A WORLD BEYOND THE SANITY

Robert is out of his adolescence.  He turned twenty some days back. He is tall, lean and not that handsome. And unlike his friends he believes in prefect (true) love.  He is against the notion to spend the time with every possible girl and make an affair. In other words, he considers that love happens once and lasts till the eternity. And he believes he has found his true love in Patricia.
It’s been two months since Robert had first seen her. And that first glimpse was ample for him to fall over her. She appealed him extra-ordinarily. She had long curly blonde hair. When she smiled, her face brightened up as a lovely sunny day with a dimple on her face. She was tall and had great figure. She was exactly the same type that Robert used to dream. No wonder that Robert was lured by the beauty of his dream girl.
Robert is a loner. Due to his leanness, low self-confidence and the fact that he has different perception about life, he is constantly bullied by other friends around. And he prefers to be alone. He has few friends and he doesn’t usually mark his presence at the social gatherings. Moreover, this lonesomeness has increased more since the day he met Patricia.

He loves sketching and writing. So he often throws himself to the lonely place where he can completely get lost in his sketching and the nature. He has a journal which he carries everywhere. He keeps himself busy in them and just neglects the world around him.

One windy evening, he buckled up and drove to the near hillock. Content with the environment, he went past the woods. As he laid down on one of the rocks, his eyes set the sights at the distant scenes. To his amazement, unlike other days, he caught a glimpse of a striking lady just some yards ahead of him. That was Patricia and that’s how he met her for the first time.
“Hello. I’m Patricia.” She tried to comfort the confused looking Robert who was still gazing her.  It was evident that he was flabbergasted.
Robert did not even blink his eyes. For the first time, he wanted to talk to a stranger; that stranger who resembled to his dream girl. And he could not believe that she was with the first stride of introduction.
She was still waiting to Robert’s response with a smirk on her face which Robert thought was truly angelic.
“Hi, I-I am R-Robert,” he managed to reply in a shaky voice. That was the initiation of their secret relationship. Robert and Patricia, from then on, started to meet regularly at the same venue. They began to share everything and in no time, fell for each other. Robert was exultant that in spite of his weak physique and average look, she was in love with him.
Days passed on with Robert meeting her secretly. Robert started to pass most of the time in that very place with Patricia or sketching things in his room which made a further declination to involving in the family activities.  There were days when he lingered quiet for hours in his room and sometimes he was caught with strange behaviors which made no sense. On the other hand, Robert was ecstatic to get Patricia as his love. Thus, he was having the time of his life.
One fine day, Robert’s dad, worried by his son’s behavior, thought to have some chat with him in the lunch time. He asked if he was in bedlam or anything was troubling him. He urged Robert to share his feelings and to reveal why he was no more social. But Robert acted insanely; he just did not listen to his dad. He skipped from one topic to another. He did not want to talk about nothing. He acted in a strange manner and started to yell at his dad with some disorganized speech. He, then, ran away towards the woods leaving his dad muddled.
Vexed by his son’s behavior, he decided to check out Robert’s room. The moment he opened the room, he was dazzled. All the things were in disarray.  He then found the sketches of his son which made no sense. They were all pathetically penciled. Mortified with that, he opened the notebook of Robert. There, too, he found jumbled letters which were all over the place and made no logic. But somewhere in the middle, he found a sheet where he had described about Patricia and himself. But Robert’s dad was too worried to withstand all those mess and immediately called a psychiatrist.
The doctor marked his presence in no time and he examined all the things in Robert’s room. Robert’s dad managed to pour all the information about Robert to the doctor. He listened serenely how things turned worse past two months. The Psychiatrist demanded to examine his son without letting Robert know about that.
According to the plan, the psychiatrist observed Robert’s actions for quite a time. He then came to know how he behaves with his family, what he does and how he does it. But he was amazed to see him drive through the wood every single day.

So, one day, he followed Robert to the forest. And what he saw was an utter dismay. He watched Robert talking for hours, alone. There was not a single being but it seemed like he was talking to someone. Doctor understood the whole thing. He recalled how Robert had mentioned about Patricia and talking to her for hours in the wood. He, now, comprehended that he was talking to none other than Patricia.
He then drove back to Robert’s home where his dad was waiting impatiently.  Doctor approached him and said,” Patricia, the girl, who your son loves, is not real. She is just an imagination of Robert which he takes as real. He is suffering from Schizophreniform Disorder.”
Robert’s dad was left stunned.
(Note: Schizophreniform disorder is a short-term type of schizophrenia, a serious mental disorder that distorts the way a person thinks, acts, expresses emotions, perceives reality, and relates to others. Like schizophrenia, schizophreniform disorder is a type of mental illness, called a “psychosis,” in which a person cannot tell what is real from what is imagined. Although schizophrenia is a life-long illness, schizophreniform disorder lasts less than six months.)
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NO PRICE FOR GRANDEUR

There was nothing unusual in her birth
She was born in the same way like everybody on earth
Unfortunately, she got birth as a daughter of poor
She was left illiterate, unskilled and that was sore
She couldn’t do anything when there was nothing to eat
Hunger thrashed her into pieces; she could feel that heat
But still she would’ve denied selling her precious body
If only she was the only offspring and there was nobody
What a pity! She was the eldest spawn of her begetter
And there were other two siblings she should look after
It was a curse that her mother died when they were so young
And because of that they had a tiny wisdom of ‘right and wrong’
The only elder she had was her father who was ignorant
He often gambled and he didn’t care of his children
In such a case she had no option but to be happily raped
For she brought smile on her sisters’ face with the money she did get
Burning her own desire she fulfilled the desires of other men
She sacrificed her life for her sisters, well embracing the pain
In spite of being that great, the society was constantly rude
The so called ‘rich ones’ detested and called her ‘a bloody prostitute’
She was not defeated at all; she was still strong to stand alone
For she had to earn to not see her siblings’ wishes being blown
The only joy she had was at least her sisters would live a respected life unlike her
But one fine day she was shattered to see a client in a brothel with her sister
This time her world crashed down utterly and she lived in agony ever after..ever after
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DANCE IN THE RAIN

Vexed by the world around me
Doomed in the hustle and bustle
Embarrassed with the loneliness
Saddened with the shrewdness of people
Upset with the surrounding; I cry
Stuck in the chaos all around
Fed up with the life I am living
Abandoned in the world of agony
Desperate to gain some sympathy
Searching the peace and love, I flee
I elope to avoid the hurdles
I leave behind the ruthless place
I lurch to the cliff of a hill
Peace is what I want to feel
From the top, I see beauty far below
Craving to embrace the charm,
I want to jump very low
In the meanwhile, the wind blew
Caressing me from head to the toe
I felt heaven for the touch was tender
Ages after, I was moved with the splendor
The wind drove away the cloud,
Both from the sky and my mind
Now the sun shone best on me
Refreshing the thoughts, my realm became sunny
I forgot the pain buried within me
The world smiled spreading the glee
I saw charm all over the territory
I watched butterflies swaying merrily,
The feeling rose, as if I were a flower
I felt special, I got power.
Amazing power bred within me
All fears gone, all melancholy omitted
There was a relief, I felt light-hearted
No feelings of lonesomeness
Most of all, I had a smile in my face
Now I don’t want to die, I want to live again
I want to throw away the pain and dance in the rain….
Dance in the rain………….
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John and his dear Granny

“Granny, look what my friend brought; a brand new PSP,” Little John rushed towards his grandmother’s bed with a big smile in his face. He was very joyful that he finally got the merchandise that he desired for. With the pocket sized silver coloured gadget, he went much closer to his Granny. But there was no reaction from her.
“Granny!!”, he shouted with fear.
With great difficulty she opened her eyes and gazed.
Her eyes were watery and they seemed tired as if she has worked all night long. Her hair was messed up and lips were dry. The wrinkles on her face were more evident and the face was swollen. She looked bluish.
The merriment John had in his eyes just vanished within a second for he had never seen his granny look more pathetic than that. He was frightened. He continued staring.
‘My dear Johnny’, she called him with sheer love. She knew that he was frightened of her condition. ‘Come sit with me.’
With trembling feet he walked closer  and sat beside her. She held his hands and asked, ’Finally you got your PSP, huh?’ She tried to distract him.
‘What happened to you Granny?’ he asked with a shaky voice instead of answering her.
‘What happened to me? I am just fine.’ She forced a smile.
Johnny did not believe her because he knew if she were fine, she would not have been lying in the bed with the terrible face, sick voice and weak eyes. His face grew pale and he could not speak a word.
“John!” his mother exclaimed, “Don’t you have to prepare for your exam? Go to your room and prepare for it. Granny is just a little sick. Let her rest.”
John was in 10th Grade and his finals were imminent. He was a hard-working guy and was one of the good students of his class. Apart from that, he had a lovely sense of humour and he was tremendously friendly. Because of that he was admired by all.
He went to his room with a very heavy heart. He loved his grandma and he could not see her that way. He opened his books but the concentration was never there. He kept on staring the books with granny in his mind.
“This way… this way”, he heard his father’s voice. He closed his books and rushed towards the granny’s room. He saw a man with long grey hair, ugly looking beard and small eyes. John didn’t like him as he looked more horrible when he smiled; he had a broken tooth upfront and a big scar on his forehead which was more like a wound created by a knife.
In no time, that ugly man and Johnny’s father lifted his Granny and put her in an ambulance. John was now clear that the ugly fellow was the driver of that ambulance. He kept staring to the ambulance while it raced towards the hospital. Nobody even told him to wipe his tears off. Those drops of tears kept on rolling down the cheek.
He went to his Granny’s bed. She was gone. He did not even know if she would be back. Beside the bed, a fresh Daisy was cheery on the table as usual. But it could not fascinate him this time. He turned towards his room ignoring its lovely scent. On the way back to his room, fishes in the aquarium danced as if they were having a great festival. With a miserable heart, he looked at them. But they were not blue like him and why would they be? Their Granny was not sick.
Days passed and his exams were going fine.  He had worked his sweat off to secure the good grades. The only pain he had in his heart was his granny was not back from the hospital and he, too, could not go visit her as he was having exam. But he was always curious about her health and asked if she was fine to his papa and mama. And they used to convey him the positive news. He used to throw a relaxed grin.
One day when he was back from his school, his mother told him to get dressed up to see her Granny. He was happy as well as sad at the same time. He was frightened if she was in serious condition. But her mother said that Granny wanted to see him because she missed him. He managed to reveal a confused smirk.
On the way to the hospital, his mind was full of random thoughts. He didn’t speak a word. No awkward looking traffic men, no funny billboard, and other stupid acts on the street made him laugh. He had just that swollen face of her Granny on his mind.
“Johnny my son”, his mother broke the silence “Granny is alright.” He kept on staring the distant object.
After a little while they were both in front of a gigantic hospital. With an increased heart rate, shaky hands and feet and confused mind state, John entered the hospital. Fair looking mother’s face gave him a boost and convinced him that granny was okay but deep down he was afraid. The smell of the hospital was always a nuisance for him. This time, too, it was no different and he had to face it. He followed his mom with a pounding heart and the cries of other patients’ in pain did nothing to help him. Finally, they both were in front of the big room.
“Room no. 414, 4th floor. Silence please.” He grasped this information with a single glance at the door and marched on. He noticed huge machines to his right and one of those showed the heart beat details of his Granny. Next to those machines was her sweet Granny, lying on the bed.
Her wrist was connected to the bottle, via pipe, which was hung just above her head. The bottle contained the water like liquid. He didn’t know what that was.
He stared his granny’s face. The face was much brighter than the last time he observed. It was no more swollen but the wrinkles were hanging loose. She seemed thinner yet beautiful than before. Her eyes were watery but not numb; they were more conversing this term. She looked livelier than before.
“Look, who is here,” she said with ecstasy, “my little prince.”
He got closer with a light heart as her voice seemed as dulcet as those merry days. She kissed his forehead and held his hand.
‘How are you, Granny?’ he asked with a smile in his face.
‘Much better now, sweetie’, she grinned.
‘Yeah, I can see that.’ He joked. ‘ You look as beautiful as a 18 year old girl.’
‘Naughty.’ She chuckled.
They conversed for some time as if they were having a party-time. That eased John’s pain of the heart as he was convinced that his Granny was getting better. In addition to that, his father also told him that the doctor’s words were positive about his granny’s health. He was happy to know that.
‘Why didn’t you come to see me these many days, huh?’ Granny pretended as if she were angry.
‘I wanted you to miss me,’ he revealed his sense of humour. He watched his Granny laughing louder. He felt greatest bliss and had teary eyes. He wiped them off with real pace to avoid her Granny’s sight at them.
‘So will you come to visit me more often from now onwards?’ she raised her eyebrows.
He wanted to say yes. Moreover, he wanted to stay there with her. But it was his exam that he should take care too. So he could not say a word for what he wanted was something he could not do.
‘He has exams, mom. And it is final. So he should be aware of that. He has to score good grade’, explained his dad. ‘So he can’t come regularly. But he will be here once in a while.’
John threw a faint smile for his father spoke the words of his mouth. Grandma kept staring at him and she too gave a sweet smile.
‘Oh yeah, I was just kidding with my prince. You need not come here often. I am getting better each day. See, I look better than before. You just keep your head cool and do your best. You need to score good marks.” Granny told John. ‘You just wait me at the home. I’ll be there soon as I’m getting better.”
 John felt awesome. He wanted her to be back as soon as possible. He came to know that she had lungs’ problem and she would be back after some days with the completion of some minor operations. Having this information, he was ready to head towards the home.
‘Granny, I will see you soon there. Take care okay?’ John said with watery eyes.
‘Aww! Don’t do that I am very fine now. It’s just about 2-3 days more and I’ll be back at the home fit and fine. You take care of your studies’, Granny told in deep voice.
She embraced him very tight and kissed him. He then headed back home and started to study with happier mind. “Just some days more and she’ll be back home”, he thought and continued to concentrate on his study.
 “Tring.. tring…” the phone sang loudly and woke him up.
“Who is calling this late?” he groaned with his eyes closed. He then turned the light on and glanced at the clock. ‘2 AM’ it showed.
The phone continued to sing in a louder voice. He quickly rushed towards the phone.
‘Ah! What a cold night?’ he murmured to himself.
He received the phone.
“Hello?”
“John?”
“Yes…”
Dad was on the phone other side. He was with Granny at the hospital. His voice was deep and depressed. John didn’t realize that as he was in half sleep.
“Call your mom, John”, he ordered.
John rushed towards his mother’s room. He didn’t know what was happening. He certainly had no clue. He forgot to ask to his father about his Granny’s health. He knocked his mother’s door.
“Mom, Dad is on the phone from the hospital,” he managed to utter only those words.
In a flash she came and received the phone.
‘What?’ she shouted in terror. ‘She is no more alive?’
All of a sudden tears started to flow from his eyes and turning to John, she said, ’Your Granny is no more son. She is gone forever.’
His feet started to tremble. He couldn’t withstand that. He landed on his knees. Tears started to rain from his eyes. He felt as if something is blocking his throat. His heart pounding and he felt an enormous pain in his chest. He could not speak a word. He thought of his Grandma. Only he knew how badly he wanted her back.
“It’s just about 2-3 days more and I’ll be back at the home fit and fine.” These words of his Grandma started to echo in his ears. The flood of the tears came down from his eyes because he knew that she would never come back. She was gone forever..
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भगवान कहाँ छन्?

पुज्नु सम्म पुजी सकें

अब मैले पनि बुझी सकें
यी फगत ढुंगा रहेछन् 
कसैले यिनलाई देवता कहेछन् 


भगवान भए पुकार सुन्थे
असहायको दुख हर्थे
ढुंगा छन् मन्दिरमा मस्त
अरु यिनकै पुजामा ब्यस्त 


देवता भए अगाडी आएर देखाइदेउ
अनि सबको दुख एकैचोटी हटाइदेउ 
तर यो मात्र एउटा ढुंगा हो
दयालु ईश्वर कसरी बन्छ यो?


देवता ढुंगामा होइन आफैंमा  खोज
खराब बाटो त्यागी असल बाटो रोज
भगवानको बास आफैं भित्र हुन्छ
ढुंगालाई पुजेर कहाँ उसले सुन्छ??



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A clueless lover


It was the first anniversary of our connection
And what an astounding reward she gave
She came up with the shocking declaration
Which was apparent on parting our ways

The dreams that I fostered over the year,
Were shattered within a single night
She abandoned without listening a word
Giving not a chance to make it right

I was left with the flower in my hand,
My eyes towards her, knees on the sand
But she never turned back to see my pain
And kept on walking forcing the tears’ rain

Every night I drank the tears to sleep
Missing the taste of her warm breathe
So obsessed with the memories I did keep
Very hard to get over, it is her all I need

Bemoaned by the sudden walk of hers
I wonder why did that happen to me?
Was it because of somebody’s curse?
Or did I hurt her which I failed to see?

Many of my words got stuck inside
The detachment is what I cannot abide
Still I ask to God every single night
To again make my world so alright

I sob at times watching the old picture
With she gone, this world has nothing to offer
I recall the time how insanely we loved one another
Believing that she’ll come back to end my suffer
And again,We shall make this place better together

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Motivating the son

After you came to the world,
my sweet little son..
I taught u how to walk
Now you are ready to run

Life is not very easy, hey,
You will find hurdles in your way…

You were as little as five pounds,
when I first lifted you..
You could reach the summit,
That’s the only thing I knew.

Now the moment has come, to rumble by your own
Never go off the track which I have always shown

Papa, papa you used to query,
“When will I be as big as you?”
With a big smirk in my face,
being proud, I used to cuddle you

You’ll know one day when you become a father,
Having a son like you is eternal glee to gather.


When you first failed in the class,
you were so afraid of me.
But I never lost my patience with you
for your intelligence is all I could see.

Come; show the world you can shine at your best
I will be your inspiration but you will have to do the rest

When you used to chuckle,
I got rid of my gloom.
On hearing your dulcet voice,
It made my Happiness bloom

Since you are approaching the teenage,
Now it’s your turn to ponder and gaze
It’s the time to shoot for your goal
Just believe in yourself and roll
No matter what, I trust you my son
I taught you to walk, now be ready to run…….
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MICHEAL IS ONLINE


“I love you, love”

“I love you more, sweetheart”

They hugged each other feeling the seventh heaven in each other’s arm. It was certain that their first kiss was coming. They looked at each other’s eyes. She appeared confident while he (Micheal) seemed a little shy as this was his first kiss. He blushed but he held his nerve and went on to experience the bliss.

“Tring…zzzzzzzzzzz…..Tring/………..zzzzz ………..Tring”The cell phone on the table started to sing and dance. “Oh Jesus!” he cried, wiped his eyes and glanced the clock-8AM. He hastily picked the phone up. “Hello……………” (Phone disconnected)He smiled. “Wow”, he said remembering the dream he dreamt about his first kiss. He gasped and talked to himself,”Micheal dude, You better get dressed up and hurry.”


AROUND ONE YEAR AGO


Moon was shining at its best proving it was a full moon night. Dogs were barking and the sound of a metal from the workshop nearby was distinct. A crowd of teenagers were partying around when the clock exactly struck 11 PM. But these things hardly drew any attention of Micheal as he was busy in his own realm. He was active in one of the chat rooms as he liked to make new friends. That day was as common as previous days because he was not finding anyone of his type. Most of the people of the chat room emphasized on advertisement or pornography. His zeal was fading away and he was somehow exhausted of that.


“Phew”, he sighed glancing the wall clock. Making new friends was his hobby but it seemed he had no luck on finding the kind of friend he was longing for. Irritation conquered him and he closed his eyes in anguish.


“Ding”, the alert sound of the chat startled him. He opened his eyes and stared the monitor. There was a private message from a girl named Sharah. He hustled and read the message, ‘Hello Micheal.’ 


He smiled and comforted himself. That was the initiation of their friendship. Days, weeks and months passed and they got closer and closer. Both started to trust each other in a magical way. They shared things and laughed together though they were far from each other.  Micheal, citizen of USA and Sharah, a British proved no distance is greater for a friendship. Micheal started to fall over Sharah. From the day he met her, he stopped entering the chat rooms. He felt complete after the friendship with Sharah. Micheal, who was living a monotonous life, started to live a joyful life. He gained his smile back. Sharah’s words always urged him to be a better person. He developed positive thoughts and he discovered the splendor of life. Dreaming her every now and then was his daily schedule. He fell in love with her yet he feared to say it to her.


“Hadn’t we met that night, what would have happened?” he asked to Sharah with all the guts one night.


“We were destined to meet, Micheal; if not that day, we would have met another day.” she replied.


That made him so jubilant. He took the long breath and continued, “I never saw you before in that chat room, how did you come that particular night?”


For the moment, silence ruled the time. Micheal’s heart beat started to increase. He didn’t know what to do?


“Micheal, I split with my boyfriend that day. I was so lonesome and heartbroken that I needed something to distract myself from that chaos. So I entered the chat room in search of a friend who could help me to get rid of the havoc.” She replied after a long pause.

Micheal was stunned. He closed his eyes and took a long breath. That night, they conversed for so long as Sharah thanked Micheal for being with her in her hard times and making her smile. After that, Micheal pondered all night long. He could not stop thinking about her. He really loved her. But he was in dilemma whether to propose her or not after knowing about her completely. With the hope of dreaming her, he closed his eyes that night.



“Dear Micheal, You were the one who dragged me out of the world of turmoil. You pulled me into your world where you gave me every possible happiness. After I met you and got to know you, I started to smile and I gradually kept on forgetting my chaos. You showed me the light in my gloomy world. You were always sweet to me and made me smile whenever I was depressed. I like you Micheal, I really do. Yours Sharah”


Micheal was astounded to see the email, next day. He could not believe his eyes. He pinched himself, but it was a reality. “Wow” he shouted in joy. He got what he wanted. He replied her describing all the feelings he had towards her. He felt as light as air. 


BACK TO THE PRESENT


Sharah called her last week and gave a surprise that she was coming to USA. Finally, the special day for Micheal had arrived. It was already 8.15 AM in the clock and he had to reach the airport to pick her at 9.00 AM. So, he jostled to pick his love. On the way, he remembered how his life ‘U-turned’ after he fell in love with Sharah. She came as an Angel in his life who spread light and happiness in his overcast life. Her love urged him to be a better person by making him believe in self.
The plane landed after he reached the airport. He was so anxious to see her. He kept on stretching his neck to catch the first glimpse of her. 


After a while, a gorgeous lady in lily white with a magnificent smile appeared. She too was very eager to see her best buddy. As soon as their eyes met, they hustled and embraced each other so tight that they felt paradise in each other’s arm. Few drops of tear rolled down their cheeks because they were experiencing the supreme joy. They were both so ecstatic to be with each other. After some refreshment, Micheal took Sharah to his favorite place for dinner, in the evening. 


Micheal wore black and Sharah was in shinning red attire. She looked like a princess and Micheal couldn’t take his eyes off her. “Stop looking me in such a way”, Sharah was shy. She blushed.


“Who else could have seen this rare genuine exquisiteness?” Micheal flirted. Sharah smiled and gave a slight punch in his cheek. Micheal was busy staring her. 


After they dined together, the soft romantic music grew louder in the background. Everybody went to the dance floor with their beloved. Micheal quickly got into his knees and asked, “Will you dance with me, sweetheart?” Sharah broadened her lips. Micheal fell in love with that smile. He had never seen a girl so fine-looking before.


“Not that easy, Mister”, Sharah wanted to judge him. He scratched his head, compressed his nose and gave a confused smile. “One second, Missy”. He vanished.


“Crazy boy”, she whispered and smiled by biting her lips.

“For the most beautiful lady”, he appeared with a bunch of red roses.

“My poor guy, so sweet”, she chuckled and threw him a kiss. They went on the dance floor.

Micheal was a horrible dancer, yet he managed to dance okay. Micheal looked at her. He was speechless to see that sort of charm. They were, hand in hand, delightful. Micheal loved the way she looked that night. He had never seen such an enchanter before. Her soft hair was hanging down on her shoulder and he held her hands tightly. He adored the way she danced, her slow and sweet tangle just made him lose in her. He enjoyed the way she stared him with those pearl like eyes. He could see the ocean of love there, so peaceful and homely. The quick breath of her made him warm inside. He wanted time to freeze right there.

Night grew older and they decided to walk home. Sharah’s hands were around Micheal’s right arm and her head on his shoulder. They were walking at a slow pace with complete silence.



Micheal broke the silence, “Sharah?” “Hmm”, she replied as if she were thinking something. “This is the best day of my life. I have never had this feeling before. You made my day, sweetheart”, he mentioned. Both remained silent for a while. Micheal glanced at Sharah. She seemed lost. But Micheal did not notice that.


“Will you marry me, Sharah?” he asked her though she never admitted that she loved him. Sharah was startled. She took her hands away from his arm and she stopped. Micheal got scared. He thought he made a mistake. “Sharah, is something wrong?” he asked with a heavy heart.


Silence once again became dominant. Micheal waited for her to reply. He continued to stare her weirdly. “It is not that easy for me to love you, Micheal.” She replied in a compressed deep voice after a long break.


Micheal got serious, “Don’t you love me, Sharah?” Sharah preferred to remain unspoken. 


She was already disheartened by her beloved before. She didn’t want the same in spite of knowing Micheal would love her forever. She feared if she would lose Micheal in the same way she lost her ex. She thought of all the negatives and she did not want all those again. She just wanted to be free. Free like a bird and enjoy the beauty all around. But she could also not deny her love from him. She liked him too much. Micheal was a precious gem for her. She was just muddled. She couldn’t decide what was good for her. It was just the past that troubled her. The pictures of the past started to play in her mind. She glanced to Micheal, he looked wretched by her answer. She knew Micheal’s perfect for her. But it was the bygone that has been bothering her. She again glanced at Micheal, she did not want to lose him neither she wanted to hurt him.


 “Micheal”, she called him pouring all her love. Micheal pretended as if he has not heard anything. Sharah became too emotional and called even more sweetly, “Micheal?”


“Yes”, he answered without looking at her.

“Love is not always explained in words, it is elucidated by eyes too.” She poured her love for him. Tears flooded down from her eyes.



Micheal looked at her eyes, saw infinite love for him. He wiped her tears, hugged her and said, “I love you, love”
“I love you more, sweetheart.” She responded. They looked at each other. Micheal still seemed shy but Sharah appeared confident. Micheal blushed as it was his first kiss. Yet he managed to hold his nerves and went on to experience the bliss.
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Lifeless Breathing

The big enticing artistic clock hanging on the wall is singing its same old tic-tic song. It is never tired of that melody which has already irritated me from some time. A slight amount of sunlight from the gigantic sun is peeking through the small crack of the wall making some objects visible in this dark room, I am in. The mere sunlight that has come through is providing further evidence to the clock’s display that it is 11 of morning.
All I can see is the blurry image of the things. In spite of that, I can easily say that I am inside the room with medical facilities, thanks to the slight illumination of the sun which is making some medicines and bandages observable. Furthermore, I can also see the room is so messed up and the pathetic smell of the medicines to my nose is making me feel edgy.
I can’t sense my lower half. I can neither move my hands nor can I move the neck. I am fixed. I can perceive some wires connected to my chest and a bottle of saline water, hung in the stand near to me, is being emptied slowly which, I can vaguely say, has connection to my wrist. I am intuiting the sound of the instruments behind me but hardly can see them as my vision is limited to only direction that is forward. I am definitely sick. No doubt.
I am not sure who I am. I even don’t know my appearance.  If someone comes with my portrait asking if I know that very person, I would confidently say, “NO.” I do not know since when I am here and how many times I have actually gained this consciousness.  I am even unfamiliar with the time that I have gained this latest mindfulness. It was dark when I woke up, no sunlight was inspecting me from outside. Literally, I am awake from the night time and it is morning now; 11.05 is what clock says exactly.  And I am not stunned to not see anybody in this chamber from then.
If someone does come and notice my breath and my moving eyes, s/he would certainly be happy and claim that I have come to life. But I have a different notion. I would say,” The fact that I’m breathing does not mean I am living. It is just a small hint that I am not dead yet.”
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